9 Ways To Tell Your Cat Doesn’t Like Your Partner

Jan 9, 2026byEmily Dawson

Cats are sensitive to changes in routine, scent, voice, and personal space, which means new people in the home can take time to adjust to.

While some cats warm up quickly, others show subtle behavioural cues when they feel uncertain or uneasy around someone new.

Learning to recognise these signs can help households move at a pace that supports comfort, trust, and gradual familiarity for everyone involved.

This article is for general knowledge only and is based on information from online sources.

Cat behaviour varies depending on personality, past experiences, health, and environment.

Ongoing or sudden behavioural changes should be discussed with a qualified veterinarian or certified animal behaviour professional.

Photos are for illustrative purposes only.

1. Tail Position Reveals True Feelings

Tail Position Reveals True Feelings
Image Credit: © 巴斯 宋 / Pexels

A cat’s tail acts like an emotional barometer, showing exactly how they feel in any situation.

When your partner enters the room and your cat’s tail puffs up or thrashes back and forth, that’s a clear sign of irritation or fear.

A tucked tail signals anxiety, while a low, stiff tail indicates serious displeasure.

Pay attention to whether this reaction happens consistently around your partner.

Cats who like someone typically hold their tails high with a slight curve at the tip.

If your feline keeps their tail in defensive positions whenever your partner is near, they’re broadcasting their discomfort loud and clear.

2. Ears Flattened Against The Head

Ears Flattened Against The Head
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Ear position speaks volumes about a cat’s emotional state.

Flattened ears pressed tightly against the head signal fear, aggression, or significant discomfort.

When your cat consistently pins their ears back whenever your partner approaches, they’re showing defensive body language.

Cats naturally rotate their ears forward when curious or content around someone they trust.

If your partner reaches out to pet your cat and those ears immediately go flat, your feline is saying they want distance.

This reaction becomes especially telling if your cat’s ears stay relaxed around other household members but consistently flatten around your partner alone.

3. Avoiding Eye Contact Completely

Avoiding Eye Contact Completely
Image Credit: © Amine İspir / Pexels

Eye contact means different things in the cat world compared to human interactions.

Cats who trust someone will make soft, relaxed eye contact and even offer slow blinks as signs of affection.

However, a cat who deliberately avoids looking at your partner is showing distrust or discomfort.

Notice whether your cat turns their head away or stares at the wall when your partner tries to interact.

This avoidance behaviour suggests your feline doesn’t feel safe enough to make visual connection.

Alternatively, if your cat stares intensely without blinking, that’s actually a threat display rather than friendly engagement with your partner.

4. Hiding Whenever They Arrive Home

Hiding Whenever They Arrive Home
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Cats naturally seek hiding spots when they feel threatened or uncomfortable.

Does your feline suddenly disappear under the bed or into a closet the moment your partner walks through the door?

That’s a powerful message about how they feel.

Confident cats who like their humans typically greet them at the door or at least stay visible in common areas.

A cat who consistently vanishes when your partner arrives is choosing flight over interaction.

Track whether this pattern happens exclusively with your partner or with other visitors too, as this distinction reveals whether the issue is specific to them.

5. Hissing Or Growling When Approached

Hissing Or Growling When Approached
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Vocal warnings like hissing and growling represent unmistakable signs of feline displeasure.

While these are technically sounds, they’re instinctive nonverbal communication rooted in body language and threat displays.

A cat who hisses at your partner is essentially saying to back off immediately.

These warning sounds often accompany defensive postures like arched backs or flattened ears.

Some cats skip subtle signals and go straight to vocalizing when they feel particularly threatened.

If your partner can’t approach your cat without triggering these defensive sounds, your feline has made their opinion crystal clear through this primal form of communication.

6. Refusing To Enter Shared Spaces

Refusing To Enter Shared Spaces
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Territory matters enormously to cats, and they’ll abandon favourite spots if someone they dislike occupies that space.

Does your cat refuse to jump on the couch when your partner sits there, even though they normally claim that cushion as their throne?

That spatial avoidance tells you everything.

Watch for patterns where your cat waits until your partner leaves a room before entering.

Cats who accept someone will share spaces comfortably, even seeking out proximity.

A feline who consistently chooses to stay away from rooms your partner occupies is voting with their paws about who they’d rather avoid completely.

7. Excessive Grooming After Physical Contact

Excessive Grooming After Physical Contact
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Cats groom themselves to maintain cleanliness, but excessive licking after your partner touches them reveals discomfort.

This behaviour represents an attempt to remove the unwanted scent and restore their sense of security.

A few licks might be normal, but frantic grooming sessions tell a different story.

Compare your cat’s reaction after you pet them versus after your partner does.

Cats comfortable with someone will settle down contentedly after affection rather than immediately washing away the interaction.

If your feline frantically licks the exact spot your partner touched, they’re essentially trying to erase the experience from their fur and memory.

8. Pupils Dilated To Full Moons

Pupils Dilated To Full Moons
Image Credit: © Ejov Igor / Pexels

A cat’s pupils change size based on lighting, but they also reflect emotional arousal.

Fully dilated pupils in normal lighting indicate fear, excitement, or aggression.

When your partner approaches and your cat’s eyes suddenly look like black saucers, that’s an alarm response.

This physiological reaction happens involuntarily when cats feel threatened or overstimulated.

Relaxed, content cats have appropriately sized pupils that match the room’s brightness.

If your cat’s pupils consistently dilate wide when your partner enters their space, their nervous system is triggering a stress response that they can’t control or hide from you.

9. Swatting Without Claws Extended

Swatting Without Claws Extended
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Cats have a whole vocabulary of paw movements that communicate their boundaries.

A swat with claws retracted represents a warning rather than an attack, essentially saying back off before this gets serious.

When your partner reaches toward your cat and receives these warning taps, your feline is being remarkably clear about their limits.

Cats who enjoy someone’s company might playfully bat at them, but the context and body language differ completely.

Warning swats come with tense body posture and often follow other stress signals.

If your cat consistently uses their paws to push your partner away, they’re enforcing personal space boundaries that shouldn’t be ignored.

Emily Dawson
byEmily Dawson

Toronto-based freelance writer and lifelong cat lover. Emily covers pet care, animal behavior, and heartwarming rescue stories. She has adopted three shelter cats and actively supports local animal charities.