Cats, just like humans, have their own type of love language. Some will rub against you, while others will sleep against you. Even if they are not the most cuddly and affectionate, your cat can still show that they love you in their own ways.
You will learn to read their cues over time. Keep in mind not all cats will demonstrate all the behaviors, so don’t worry! Your cat is simply expressing their affection the way they are most comfortable.
Slow Blinking
Eye contact is extremely important with cats. If they are meeting your eyes and then slowly blinking, that’s one way they are showing their love. They only stare into the eyes of those they trust and care for.
If your cat is slowly blinking at you, do it back to them! This will also tell them how much you love them when you mirror their behaviors.
Tail Expression
Your cat’s tail can be very expressive, especially when it comes to showing their love. Check to see how they are holding it. An upright tail with a hook at the top is a happy, content cat.
The same applies when it comes to a cat that is swishing its tail back and forth. They are happy with you. If you’ve just come home, they’re happy to see you!
Bumping Against You
Using their heads or bodies, cats can nestle against you as a show of affection. They’re also marking you with their scents when they headbutt you, telling all other cats and animals that you’re part of their pack.
This claiming gesture goes back to when they were kittens when they rubbed against their moms and litter mates. You’re family, and your cat wants you to smell like it.
Grooming
When your cat starts to lick you, they’re trying to take care of you. They groom those they love, so those slow, methodical licks are their way of showing their affection. Much like headbutting, this is a marking behavior, too. They are sharing their scent with you.
Additionally, if your cat lets you groom them, especially by brushing, they are showing they trust you to take care of them. Just make sure that you take care, especially if there is matted hair. Pulling can hurt them and break the moment.
Showing their Bellies
Any animal on its stomach is in an incredibly vulnerable position, and that’s especially true with cats. If they are lying on their back and showing their bellies, they are in a place they trust. With that trust comes love, so feel proud you’ve made a safe space for them.
Sleeping with You
Much like lying with their bellies exposed, cats who sleep with you – even if it’s just in the same room – are showing how much they love and trust you. If something goes wrong, they know that you’ll keep them safe, and that is the ultimate sign of love.
Kneading
Kneading is a behavior when your cat pushes their front paws down in rhythmic motions. If you pet them when they do this, they’re completely relaxed. This is a comforting behavior that harkens back to when they were nursing with their mother. They pushed and pulled as they were getting nutrients until they were in a food coma!
Communication
Our cats’ meows and purrs mean different things, so get comfortable with reading the context! If they are short and quiet meows, they’re engaging in conversation with you. If they are purring, they are in a state of bliss. Both of these are signs they love you because they’re engaging with you directly.
Following You
If your cat is following you around or meeting you at doors, they’re often doing what they can to stay in your company. They love you, so they want to be around you. Make sure you’re paying attention. If your cat is weaving between your legs or following too closely, they can easily get underfoot.
Love Bites
Cats, kind of like babies, can explore the world through their mouths. If they’re giving you a gentle nibble or nick, they can be trying to play with you and get your attention. They’re seeking out your love, so make sure you give them pets or plays in exchange! If the bite gets too hard, redirect. They need to know it’s no longer a sign of love.
Bringing You Gifts
If your cat is bringing you gifts, then they are trying to show off for you. They’re proud of their spoils, and they want to boast. This can be a toy, but it can also be a mouse, insect, or other live prey animal. Cats are hunters at heart, after all!
How to Strengthen Your Bond
While you can’t force your cat to love you, there are some things you can do to help strengthen your bond.
- Play with them. Find out what type of play your cat likes, and make it a priority to play with them every day! When you have fun together, you strengthen your bond.
- Sit together. Not all cats like to be touched, but simply being in the same room together can be enough to get closer. As your cat becomes more comfortable, they may get closer to you. Follow their lead, and don’t force it.
- Brush them if they’ll let you! Not all cats like to be groomed, but by brushing and caring for them, you will show them you will always be there for them.
- Follow their lead. Cats are independent by nature, so if you try to force behaviors or affection, it will end up doing the opposite. Don’t make them hang out with you or cuddle. Handle them with care.
It takes time to bond with your cat, especially if they are an older cat. Don’t rush it. Through consistent and kind care, your cat will soon love you just as much as you love them!
